Sentences that didn't make it into the paper

A story about those guys who do Luganda commentary on British soccer matches:

  • When listening to Katamba and Dumba do their commentaries, they will give enormous player profile and accurate information and statistics after a mere fowl committed, goal scored.
  • Katamba attributes this to being in the soccer field for a while and the pre match preparation. They have a two-hour pre match preparation, of which this time I was part, to study the teams, players and their respective countries and the team couch.
  • He’s giving the proceedings of the game on a touch-for-touch commentary. The main business is “Lampard gets the ball, gives it to Makelele, Makelele to Drogba. Oh no! Ferdinand intercepts. It’s now Paul Scholes, to Ronaldo, no he suits wide!”

I am worth every penny I am paid.

Comments

Cheri said…
damn right u are!


Yay...sokies! Baz,I'm hot at your heels.
Call me The Don!
Near-sokies!

And you know what I find funniest? They say the obvious crap. The crap everybody either already knows or will find out in a minute. So why don't they give their jaws a break?
`Goal ... no, wide. Very wide.' Yes, of course, since I've not heard any celebration from the shack next door.
Kenyanchick said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Kenyanchick said…
"He suits wide" sounds like a line from a deep and very existential Buddhist haiku.

You know:
He suits wide often
One hand tries to clap alone...

Maybe I should just lay off the weed and start looking for a job.
Minty said…
Ohhh, my bad!! If KC hadn't retyped it here, I thought 'twas some footie lingo I'd never heard. He suits wide. He shoots wide. Kill me quick, my ribs hurt.
Iwaya said…
this must be what they mean when they say that you're dying in the line of duty from the fire?!