Random Mathurrogits

1. I’m Ernest Bazanye. I duck and I weave and 12 rounds later, there’s not a scratch on me? You may not call me the winner, but I don’t call me a loser.

2. I tell you what I think, but I won’t tell you the truth. This is my blog. If I stop lying I’d just disappoint you.



3. I asked one mycar what he thought of boda bodas. He replied, “Filth, vermin, scum, pieces of shit, bastards, plonkers, goat-turds…” and then I left because I didn’t have all day, and he didn’t look like he was about to wrap up.

This is the thing though. I know you mycars want bodapilots dead. But what is your beef with me? I am just the guy on the back, I am not the one skipping lanes, why do you want me to die too?

I have tried to be reasonable. I have tried to give stern looks to angry drivers who just tried to sideswipe my pilot and consequently, me, into the pavement, and I have tried the finger. But that doesn’t work. So, this is your last warning.

I have a buddy in Ntinda (fuck blogger for killing my links: http://2bnileavenue.blogspot.com/2007/03/sht.html) who runs a clothing store. Selling things like “sheer velour boustier” and “fitted woolen jacket with sheringbone pink piping” and stuff, but it is actually just a front for his gun-running business. I will go to him and get a fully-automatic Mack 11 and a carton of hollow tip bullets and a shoulder holster to wear when I ride the boda. Then we shall see who will mess with me.

Fuck around and turn this into mad max.

4. This beat is hot! Tumtumtumtum… I thought I had finally got to link it properly but blogger.com is a bunch of maggots at the bottom of a Fumbleland pit lat. Cut and paste into your browser please: http://www.sundayvision.co.ug/detail.php?mainNewsCategoryId=7&newsCategoryId=453&newsId=555887

5. Maybe you find the methods and the policies and the structure of the aid industry suspect at the higher levels, but you cannot hate on the footsoldiers.
Every time I see a young American or European aid volunteer I am humbled. I have nothing but deep and honest admiration for these people.
The chick didn’t have to. She could have stayed in Little Rock and spent the year eating pizza and watching movies and dancing to the latest Justin in the nightclub. Instead she chose to be in Rakai making a vital contribution to improving the lives of people who need help.
People who are being neglected by their own countrymen. Like us privileged Kampala people. Who are too busy eating pizza and watching movies and dancing to the latest Justin in the nightclub to go dig a borehole for our compatriots.

Comments

Carlo said…
gwe, your background swallows up your posts!! i like the whole i am ernest thing. you finally admited to being such a "not winner"!! LOL!
Baz said…
Carlo, is that better? I went through hell to fix it.
Quillonpaper said…
No. 5 there, we surf the same wave Baz. Bless your heart! And to know that lots of times we wait for int. media to give these situations airplay before we can even attempt to lend a helping hand. Shame on us. Case in point, see how we fall over ourselves after watching "invisible children"... we surely cuda done 10 or more of those since that problem came up.
Cheri said…
U almost threw a punch in the air there somewhere. Or that wall got it.

Some beef.

Why did u burst my bubble up there at # 2?
Kenyanchick said…
I always knew Degs was running a shell corporation. I knew it.

No dude knows that much about pleats and herringbone. There had to be some 24 shit going down...
Aseu said…
Baz, this one you have just pucnhed us below the belts...some eye opener eh?
Aseu said…
I meant punch...
Anonymous said…
i have failed to open that new vision link..

i gave u on boda boda coz i got en rivals who have ars
Cheri said…
*tsk tsk* @BS.....WAT????
Is there a chance that the privileged pizza eating justin loving kampalans can afford only their lifestyle.do they have the resources to go to rakai and dig boreholes? selfish as the question seems.
that chick that abandoned little rock might have an org. doing the financial backup....or maybe she doesn't eat pizza?
and I apologize about this essay.
leos child said…
dont blame us, my friend went to sanyu babies home and wanted to volunteer, the old lady told her they already have volunteers from norway.then she kept asking her who her father was where she stays i dont think these things are of use when some one decides to volunteer especially asking who her father is and where they stay!!!!
Anonymous said…
Baz said..

I was speaking to a friend of mine, an African, who just got back from States, about the issue of Peace Corps and volunteer aid workers. She confirmed that there was more than pure altruism motivating our expat volunteers—a year of borehole sinking looks good on a college and job application. This only diminishes my admiration by the most minute fraction.
It is also true, scotchie, that an American can afford to take a year off to dig pit latrines, whereas if I want my career to continue on the right track, I should make sure I have an consistent list of good companies on my CV. No gaps like “Where were you in 2005?” “I was in Karamoja teaching people about a balanced diet.” They will give the job to the dude who spent 2005 doing internship at Pricewaterhousecoopers or something.
The reason for my admiration isn’t so much because I think there is a great sacrifice being made, it is that, I know I should be doing that work, but I haven’t done it yet. I have got to hand it to those who have.
Saadiq said…
Lol..i can hook u up wit a colt eagle...44 magnum..upto 50 rounds,wat do u say?

As for Angela Kintu,man that post was deep..deep i tell u..anyone who knows her shud tell her she is my newest crush..strong black and young..and yeah she shud blog!

About those chaps from lil rock who come to do voluntary work, well some come here coz it looks good on their cv..others genuinely, wat ive realised is that some companies dont recognise the spirit of voluntarism while others do..companies in Uganda tend to look at academics only and not other activities outside academics!
Samantha said…
Some volunteers come to enjoy our tropical climate and for adventure. Others have just had broken relationships and need to get away from home for a while. Some genuinely come believing that all Africans are starving to death and need their help. Honestly speaking, thank God there is alot of food in Uganda because if we were to have none, we would all die. Aid organizations or not.

I think if all of aid organizations went out of business today, very few would miss them and many would be better off. People know what is good for them. If Africans were allowed to develop economically, we wouldn’t be this needy. If you look at the development that's taken place in Asia in the past 20 years, none of that can be attributed to foreign aid. It all came about through change in government policies that allowed people to invest their money.
my all-time favourite play is "the importance of being earnest" by oscar wilde. u should read it if u haven't. the best scene is when algernon tasks jack (ernest) to clear the question of cecily before he can allow him to marry his cousin gwendoline or give him back his lost cigarette case. jack must also explain why he's called ernest in town and jack in the country. i brought this up because your name is ernest and your satire or writing style perfectly matches 16th literature. and then of course i feel if you hit the stage; u and 27th comrade (i think he's the one who can match u in here) to act "the importance of being ernest" and u played jack while he acted algernon, it would be such an interesting watch.

well, no.3, no3!!
Cheri said…
@Joshi.....she already does have a blog!

(carefully tryna steer clear of this intellectual argument!)
Saadiq said…
@Cher..Na lie-ohh?
Anonymous said…
Dear Baz, I really like your blog. The foot soldiers of the development brigade deserve no admiration or respect from anyone. They are not here because they care more about us than we care about ourselves. They are here because of a misguided messiah/superiority complex, among other things, e.g, it looking good on a CV, escaping wretched relationships, looking for themselves (whatever that means), for adventure, to travel the world etc, etc. None of it is altruistic, and, we should not be fooled into believing, or carrying on the belief that a white person in Africa is benign and loves us deeply.

We justin and pizza lovers (I like to think most of us do), also do a lot for our folks - okay, maybe not the ones in Rakai. We support siblings financially, be it, paying school fees, giving seed money for businesses, helping our parents financially etc etc. We do give back to our communities, so, do not tell us to value the efforts of some chick and boyfie from little rock over that of what we do.

Popular Posts