Too easy
It is way too easy to go and sound gay. I am not just talking about when a male person uses the word "fuschia" in a sentence. And reveals that he actually knows what it means.
(For the record, I wasn’t even sure how to spell it, okay?)
Now, I happen to know a few stellar constellations. Constellations as in those star groups with names. I know a lot of useless things and constellations is one of them. I don’t think I can offer a valid excuse or reason why. I was bored and young and stupid. Instead of using my time constructively I went and learnt where Taurus is in the sky.
I mentioned this to a friend of mine once, innocently and in passing, as one does. He mulled over it for a second then, evidently thinking “This shit might impress chicks” he asked me to show him some.
Actually, he is a born again Christian, so his thoughts might have been more like, “This s**t might impress chicks”, but he asked me to teach him a couple of constellations and I did. I showed him Orion, Canis Major, Scorpio and The Pleiades. The exhibition was carried out in a stoically macho way, with no sentiment whatsoever. All I did was grunt and point. “That one is Orion, that one is Scorpio etc”.
The very next day, when this chap and I met in a populated area where there were very many people with ears, out of the blue, and with no provocation at all, he blurted out, “Baz, we should go and look at the stars again tonight.”
He leater explained that he just wanted to make sure the diagrams he had drawn in preparation for his chick-impressing activities were accurate. But I still had to spend the next few weeks fending off mean jokes and cruel cajolings.
Such as those you are thinking of right this minute.
(For the record, I wasn’t even sure how to spell it, okay?)
Now, I happen to know a few stellar constellations. Constellations as in those star groups with names. I know a lot of useless things and constellations is one of them. I don’t think I can offer a valid excuse or reason why. I was bored and young and stupid. Instead of using my time constructively I went and learnt where Taurus is in the sky.
I mentioned this to a friend of mine once, innocently and in passing, as one does. He mulled over it for a second then, evidently thinking “This shit might impress chicks” he asked me to show him some.
Actually, he is a born again Christian, so his thoughts might have been more like, “This s**t might impress chicks”, but he asked me to teach him a couple of constellations and I did. I showed him Orion, Canis Major, Scorpio and The Pleiades. The exhibition was carried out in a stoically macho way, with no sentiment whatsoever. All I did was grunt and point. “That one is Orion, that one is Scorpio etc”.
The very next day, when this chap and I met in a populated area where there were very many people with ears, out of the blue, and with no provocation at all, he blurted out, “Baz, we should go and look at the stars again tonight.”
He leater explained that he just wanted to make sure the diagrams he had drawn in preparation for his chick-impressing activities were accurate. But I still had to spend the next few weeks fending off mean jokes and cruel cajolings.
Such as those you are thinking of right this minute.
Comments
I can predict the look on my face if someone ever interrupts my breezy evening with astrology101. 'and now my dear,thats taurus.'
Scotchbiscuits, I refuse to find out what it is. Knowing stars is hazardous enough.
Ok. How come it's funky for girls to know a lot about guy stuff, but geeky the other way round?
Some things guys arenot supposed to know.
@Jay, hahaha. Where did you learn such things?
cream is cream, not beige, not butterscotch, not pale, not creamish!
brown is brown..not woody, not teak, not marigold not golden rod!
red is red..not crismon, not scarlet, no maroon, not coral!
blue is blue..not turquoise, not aqua, not electric, not cyan,
so if u start saying " honey, pls iron my aquamarine shirt for me. the one with spring green flowers and salmon red fish." don't say we didn't warn u!
@Minty...we are so lucky we can get away with all this trash!
Is that Orion in your belt or are you just... oh, never mind.
Sly Bratha!!
Easter Bunny, you shouldn't call people gay. You will hurt their feelings.
@Cherie, if dude knows those colours, he will probably do a better job with the ironing, so give him your blouses and skirts instead.
@ Queen of Comments, you are beyond cruel.
Jaribu, The real Christians boys are praying, not checking out babes so the guys who be scooping up sistren in church are all sinners..
@ Majonzi, I was told that the coasts of the US are the gayest places on earth. If you drop your wallet in New York, leave it on the ground or someone will come up and bum you. Then I watched Rent and it was all confirmed.
2. and majonzi and baz, no straight guys are as gay as indian fellows. they dont just hold hands in public, they like touch each other and stuff! if i was a guy here, i would be in fights everyday or maybe invest in a tshirt that said "hands off!" or something like that...