All The Other Slim Shadys

Friday evening, and there is a palpable quickening in the city’s heartbeat. Kampalans are watching the clock, waiting for the second they can fold their files, shut down their computers, give their boss the finger behind his or her back and head out for forty-eight hours of rest and relaxation. It is Kampala, the weekend, and time to chill.
Well, it is for most of you. For the rest of us, it is time to punch out of one job and get started with our other one.

Cos these drugs ain’t gonna deal themselves.

The market for marijuana has been steadily growing, as has the market for virtually every other essential commodity in Uganda, and this has meant competition. However, as businessmen, we welcomed it, and took it as a challenge to improve our services and the quality of our product. The benefits have been felt by our hundreds of thousands of satisfied customers.
However, since Eminem songs started playing on local radio, the industry has gone crazy. Eminem songs, with the never-ending list of narcotic substances they advertise, have thrown the industry into panic. Dealers like myself, together with bodabodas and the hardworking peasants of this, our motherland, had created a reliable and well-understood distribution network for the weed. But now we have a mad scramble to get our hands on the exotic and rare drugs Eminem has created a huge demand for. We need to locate not only cocaine, heroin and crack, but also ecstasy, vicadin, percocet, shrooms, purple pills… It takes a lot of work, and more often than not, interaction with Russians, who do speak English, just not very well.

And this particular weekend the kids are back from school, so it’s going to be hectic! Sigh. Well, another night, another several dollars…

Comments

Anonymous said…
You got all the new stuff and you never hooked me up?
Anonymous said…
My name is Laura Clos and i would like to show you my personal experience with Percocet.

I am 43 years old. Have been on Percocet for 1 week now. It does kill the pain, but I found that I get itchy with this drug like I do w/ morphine.

I have experienced some of these side effects-
Itchiness and bizarre dreams about zombies.

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Laura Clos